Hell’s Bells!

 

With this novel, I've begun a journey into two unusual worlds—the world where auras can be perceived and curses on those auras can be invoked, and the world of authorship. I have no maps, no GPS, no Feodor's Guide. Fortunately, however, my fictional heroine Elzetta Swan and I share two important characteristics: tenacity and an inner child that just won’t quit. Enjoy!

Curse Me Not

​(2014)

 

Appalachian unsophisticate Elzetta Swan has gained a rare ability considered very lucrative in her reality: she can see people’s auras and clean revenge curses off those auras. Even though the ability comes gift-wrapped in premature menopause and ill-timed hot flashes, Elzetta embraces it faster than grass through a goose. She’s moved to “The Big City” (Knoxville, Tennessee) and, as our story opens, she’s about to finish her first year as a legally licensed bodywasher with a countrified inner child that’s skipping all the way to the bank.

 

Suddenly a routine aura cleansing turns ugly. Elzetta suspects a professional invoker has come to town—one who’s hooked on the rush of setting particularly nasty curses. If that wasn’t bad enough, the invoker may be visiting at the invitation of a mysterious local with a malicious hard-on for revenge.

 

Well-intentioned but often out of her depth, Elzetta attempts to track down the culprits. In doing so, she ends up facing threats to her trendy new life as well as to the hallelujah hankering she’s formed for a reluctant—and way too sexy—urban white knight who’s crossed her path. Will the confrontations create in Elzetta a vengeful rage all her own?

 

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Available in print and  e-book at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and   Champagne Books

. . . 

     Frustration became a bad taste in my mouth, as did disappointment. I’d sent Cal and his police buddies on a stupid, stupid goose chase and for what?

     I thought of Book’s hostile and near-anorexic face and poor Miss Patrice looking lost in her nightgown and robe. I had cleansed a major curse when it should have been a minor one, I had seen a glimpse of something deadly in Book’s aura and, while I’d never dealt with a saturated invoker before, I knew from my training that Book could seriously hurt someone with his curses. He’d definitely hurt himself.

     Closing my eyes, I took a deep breath. I couldn’t allow the police to dismiss the invoker, but how could I convince them to continue the search for him?

     “Elzetta, is there something you can do as a bodywasher?” Cal asked, breaking into my thoughts. “Since you work with auras, maybe you can pick something up from the vibes in this room that you can use to track Book.”

     With a sad resignation I opened my eyes to look up at the two men.

     “Gentlemen, I’m not a psychic. I’m not clairvoyant or precognitive, and I’m definitely not an auravestigist, which is what you’re actually asking for. I don’t even think people can do that ESP stuff, although I guess that must sound strange coming from a bodywasher.”

     I found myself having to turn away from their scrutiny—especially Cal’s—before I could continue.

     “Look, I do see people's auras. I know what an aura looks like when it’s healthy, and I know what it looks like when it’s been cursed. I know what an aura can look like at birth, at puberty, whenever. I even know what an aura looks like when a person is dying,” I said remembering that last day with Mom a little more than a year ago. Then, with as much resolution as I could muster, I looked from Cal to Detective Griffin and back to Cal again. My eyes were starting to tear up, and I forced myself not to blink.

     “And I know, from what little I saw of his aura, I know Claude Book—heaven help him—is a very, very dangerous young man. Oh, I wish I could be more help. I know this must seem like such a wasted effort to you.”

     I stared at Cal, willing him to understand. His poker face was back, and the detective beside him no longer acted amused. I couldn’t tell if they truly grasped my fears or if they just thought I was wacko. If the detective’s gentle, almost pitying smile was any indication, I’d put my money on wacko.

THE REVIEWS ARE IN!

 

A very original story. I loved the theme of an aura cleanser. Elzetta is very fascinating, and her ability is as well. Well written with vivid details and dialog [that makes] you feel as if you are part of the story. The characters are colorful, unique, some quirky and. . .[there's] a great balance of humor, fun situations, serious situations, danger, intrigue and a splash of romance. I definitely recommend Curse Me Not to those who like an original, paranormal romance.

— Sheri Wilkinson, Juniper Grove Reviews (5 out of 5 stars)

 

I’m just going to say it: I loved this book. Most [in the genre] are about teens so reading from Elzetta’s perspective as a woman who’s already lived a good bit of life…was refreshing. The plot was interesting and the premise new. I loved the author’s writing style. Elzetta’s voice came in loud and clear, and her charming turn of phrase had me laughing out loud. But the descriptions the author gave of auras, or really anything else, was beautiful. I could not put this book down. Elzetta and the Captain’s chemistry is off the charts too! I hope the second book comes out soon, because I will be buying it!

—Ali Barnard, Bargain Book Reviews  (4.8 out of 5 stars)

 

The best part [of Curse Me Not] for me besides the undeniable chemistry between Elzetta and Caleb McGrath was the often understated humor that was sprinkled liberally throughout. Elzetta is a strong, independent-minded woman with a lot of compassion for others. This was a fun read that fully captured my imagination!

— Laurie’s Thoughts and Reviews (5 out of 5 stars)

 

Elizabeth Fisher has created a whole new take on the paranormal. I'm a big fan of paranormal romance and I've yet to come across a book quite like this one. It was captivating and very well plotted. I was expecting witches, wolves, vampires or the like and I got a charming aura cleaner from a backwoods town in Tennessee. This is truly a unique take…on the genre.

— Online Book Club  (4 out of 4 stars)

 

All of [the characters] have personality traits and quirks that breathe life into a unique and spellbinding story that is a break from action-packed paranormal novels filled with supernatural characters. If you are looking for a unique, realistic and entertaining story that has some personality to it, then I highly recommend you grab a copy of Curse Me Not by Elizabeth Fisher.

— On My Kindle Reviews (5 out of 5 stars)

 

[Curse Me Not] tells the story in a unique and beautiful way. This book deserves the five-fang rating for not just the [character’s] voice … but also [for] the story itself.

—Fang Freakin-tastic Reviews (5 out of 5 stars)

 

Curse Me Not is a wonderful little gem that's a delight to read! The idea of a bodywasher is unique, yet Fisher writes so well, one is inclined to believe they could exist. The characters are all distinctive and sympathetic. One even feels for the villain in this novel!

— InD’tale Magazine  (4.5 out of 5 stars)

 

Elzetta Swan is the perfect character with her "Hell's Bells" exclamations to her insecurities of how she meets the man of her dreams. …Curl up with it, and it will be hard to put down until you reluctantly turn the last page. Loved it and hope there is another Elzetta book in the works!

— Penny C  (4 out of 5 stars)¶

 

[Fisher’s] paranormal theme is so very close to seeming like it could…be happening that it really hooks you…is absolutely refreshing and original, which alone is worth the read.

— Melissa M  (5 out of 5 stars)

 

Curse Me Not was a really refreshing novel. I've been reading Urban Fantasy for a while now and have never come across anything like it. I…suggest it if you're looking for a Urban Fantasy you won't want to put down.

— LilyElement Book Reviews  (4 out of 5 stars)¶

 

Elizabeth Fisher writes a fun and mysterious Southern tale of what happens when revenge can be served a curse, as long as the money's there. The plot is intriguing from the word 'go'. . . it's amusing, fun and the focus on the bad guy isn't lost in the lust.

The Coffee Pot Review  (3 out of 5 stars)¶

 

The wait is over. Finally a compelling romantic paranormal adventure without a vampire or werewolf in sight. And one for adult women and not teens! I especially love the heroine Elzetta. Her attitude is so much fun but "real" at the same time.

— Brenda A  (5 out of 5 stars)

 

Sexy, funny, I couldn't put it down...all that despite the fact the heroine doesn't know how to kick ass and the villain turns out to be someone deserving of pity. The perfect weekend or beach read.

— Jennifer B (5 out of 5 stars)

 

It was refreshing to read a paranormal romance that didn't have a teen or young twenty-something as the lead female. The whole bodywashing thing in the story made it a fun, interesting read.

—Fawnzy, FanaticalParanormalRomantical.com (5 out of 5 stars)

What I liked about this novel was that it…focused on the case – the drama of what was happening with the curses and this particular invoker…[It was full of] suspense, drama, comedy and witty commentary. The romance is realistic and totally believable, and I seriously appreciate that the main characters are over 40, which pleasantly deviates from the…genre. I…recommend [this novel] to…audiences who appreciate realism with their paranormal romance.

—Victoria Lane for TheRomanceReviews.com (3 out of 5 stars)

Elizabeth Fisher delivers a wonderful paranormal romance. Curse Me Not has everything: suspense, romance, friendship, betrayal and heart. It has all the perks of a crime novel mixed with the whimsy of a romance.

—Readers' Favorite (5 out of 5 stars)

Let me just say that this isn't my genre…but I loved this book. The protagonist does not belong to the boring, annoying ranks of youthful perfection that are especially common in this genre. Elzetta Swan is spunky, adorable and sensible, and I want to be her friend. Modern fiction is starved for female roles that are multi-faceted, imperfect and relatable. Fisher delivers this in bulk with Elzetta. Brava. The interactions between her and the Captain are sweet, sexy and more importantly, not cringe worthy. If you're looking for fantastic characters and an engaging story with smart, snappy writing, this book's for you no matter what your genre is.

— Becky P (5 out of 5 stars)

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AUTHOR'S NOTE ABOUT REVIEWS: This author is pleased to confirm that she has not, nor will she, pay for a review of her work. On occasion, she has provided a copy of Curse Me Not to reputable reviewers in exchange for an honest review. 

 
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